Obituary

[WMSteed@aol.com]

In light of the past few month's V2020 postings, the following seemed 
particularly timely:

Obituary,   6/02 -     COMMON SENSE

>

>     In light of Wednesday's federal appeals court ruling

>     declaring the Pledge of Allegiance unconstitutional, we mourn

>     the passing of an old friend by the name of Common Sense.

>     Common Sense lived a long life but died in the United States

>     from heart failure at the start of the new millennium. No one

>     really knows how old he was, since his birth records were

>     long ago lost in bureaucratic red tape.

>

>     He selflessly devoted his life to service in schools,

>     hospitals, homes, factories helping folks get jobs

>     done without fanfare and foolishness.

>

>     For decades, petty rules, silly laws and frivolous lawsuits

>     held no power over Common Sense. He was credited with

>     cultivating such valued lessons as to know when to come in

>     out of the rain, why the early bird gets the worm and that

>     life isn't always fair.

>

>     Common Sense lived by simple, sound financial policies (don't

>     spend  more than you earn), reliable parenting strategies

>     (the adults are  in charge, not the kids) and it's okay to

>     come in second.

>

>     A veteran of the Industrial Revolution, the Great Depression

>     and the  technological Revolution, Common Sense survived

>     cultural and educational trends including body piercing,

>     whole language and "new  math." But his health declined when

>     he became infected with the "If-it-only-helps-one-person-it's-

>     worth-it" virus.

>

>     In recent decades, his waning strength proved no match for

>     the  ravages of well intentioned but overbearing regulations.

>     He watched in pain as good people became ruled by self-

>     seeking lawyers.  His health rapidly deteriorated when

>     schools endlessly implemented zero-tolerance policies.

>     Reports of a six-year-old boy charged with sexual harassment

>     for kissing a classmate, a teen suspended for taking a swig

>     of mouthwash after lunch and a teacher fired for reprimanding

>     an unruly student only worsened his condition.

>

>     It declined even further when schools had to get parental

>     consent to administer aspirin to a student, but could not

>     inform the parent  when a female student was pregnant or

>     wanted an abortion.

>

>     Finally, Common Sense lost his will to live as the Ten

>     Commandments became contraband, churches became businesses,

>     criminals received  better treatment than victims, and

>     federal judges stuck their noses in everything from the Boy

>     Scouts to professional sports.

>

>     Finally, when a woman who failed to realize that a steaming

>     cup of  coffee is hot was awarded a huge settlement - and a

>     federal court declared the Pledge of Allegiance unconstitutional -

>     Common Sense threw in the towel.

>

>     As the end neared, Common Sense drifted in and out of logic

>     but was kept informed of developments regarding questionable

>     regulations  such as those for low flow toilets, rocking

>     chairs and stepladders.

>

>     Common Sense was preceded in death by his parents, Truth and

>     Trust; his wife, Discretion; his daughter, Responsibility;

>     and his  son, Reason.  He is survived by two stepbrothers: My

>     Rights, and Ima Whiner.

>

>     Not  many attended his funeral because so few realized he was

>     gone.