vision2020
RE: skate park
I have to agree that too many people (children, youth and adults) view
individualism and strong identity synonymous with rebellious and sometimes
anti-social behavior. This is nothing new. When I was younger (a few years
ago!) my peers listened to mind blowing loud music, smoked stuff! Walked
around like hoodlums and generally acted like jerks just to be different. I
like my music loud... but not to the point of damaging myself! I like to
have fun... but never understood the drugs and alcohol thing. I was the one
person that was very different (I am sure you never would guess this now!)
among my peers. When I was growing up as a teenager in Cd'A everyone knew
me! I was an athlete, a musician, a scientist, an actor, you name it... no
one could cubbyhole me into one category. The kids of my era, as today,
tried to develop an identity for themselves. There are, unfortunately, too
many negative ways to differentiate ones self! I personally think it has to
do with parenting. Why did I not get into drugs and alcohol? Was it my
religious beliefs? Was it that I did not have fun? Was it because there was
a genetic imprint that prohibited self-destruction? Was it because my
parents were on my case about drugs? No... my parents never talked about
drugs directly... they told me what they do... I saw my peers who used it...
I knew it was not for me! I was always larger than average! I am trained in
martial arts... I can push people around all I want! Why was I the
anti-bully! I hated and neutralized bullies all my life! Why? Was it because
my parents were always after me to be nice to others? No... We as parents
teach our children by example. If we are quick to anger... if we have to
have a drink every time we are stressed... if we get physically abusive when
we get upset... when we lie... we cheat... etc. we are telling our children
that this is normal behavior. You can talk to your kids about alcohol until
you are blue in the face... if every time you are "having fun" it involves
alcohol... you are reinforcing that onto your children.
Children do, however, learn from their peers as well. So as parents we are
reluctant to allow our children to keep the company of the wayward ones!
Children, especially teenagers are young adults with most physical
capabilities of adults. If we as parents fail to insure that they have all
emotional, spiritual, social, mental, and rational capabilities of a
responsible adult then we end up with a dangerous mix; it is like a car
without brakes! If we do our job and the children grow strong as human
beings they will easily overcome evil. As with myself, the wrong path will
offer them not advantage so they will not take it!
The recent shootings in schools are not only the act of a mad child but an
abused child. I am not trying to excuse the children who act violently but
the fact is that all of these children were abused in one way or another. It
has not been that long that I have forgotten the mean spirited youth picking
on the "geek" in the school. Well... I made it a point to befriend that
"geek" and protected him. What would have happened if one of the popular
kids had done that with the youth involved in the latest shooting? Would we
have had the shooting? I bet not! We can place police in every school... we
can place a cop in every class... all we would do is to aggravate the
situation. It did not work in the Eastern Europe under communism... it will
not work here. You cannot dictate away violence... you have to love it away!
"Your brother in arms"
Shahab...
PS. I am glad that our youth are contributing to this forum. I believe this
to be critical. As a parent I encourage my children to not shy away from
discussions with adults... in fact we encourage it. Often they have views
untainted by extended exposure to the negativity of this world.
-----Original Message-----
From: Kacey Krehbiel [mailto:kaceyk@moscow.com]
Sent: Monday, April 16, 2001 3:25 PM
To: Ry Jones; vision2020@moscow.com
Subject: Re: skate park
I find this very funny, I am not afraid of "our" children. I am one of
"your"
children. I am embarrassed by the pitiful attempts of "self expression"
many
of them only know how to express themselves through crude language,
rebellion,
and sometimes violence.
-Kacey
Ry Jones wrote:
> From: Kacey Krehbiel
> > The skate park has only the influences of swearing, smoking, and
sometimes
> illegal behavior.
>
> I'm discouraged by the extraordinarily broad brush you use to paint our
> youth.
>
> Not even 7 years ago I was spending every free day at the Burnside Project
> in Portland, skating until I couldn't walk, hanging out with other
skaters,
> and having a lot of fun.
>
> Yes, there was swearing. Yes, there was smoking. And sometimes, illegal
> behaviour. For the most part it was kids hanging out and skating all day
and
> night.
>
> Why are you so afraid of our children?
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